A classmate and friend left our shores for America over five decades ago. He sees himself more as an American now and rightly so. America has done well by him and he has done well by America. Besides, he hasn’t been home more than a couple of times in the fifty-odd years he has been away. He is inquisitive but polite when matters concerning Nigeria are raised in the group chat even when quite a few mates are ranting against the country.

On the other hand, he is very quick to defend America when negative issues come up against his naturalized country. I had wanted to take him up a couple of times and burst some of his bubbles but I always hesitated. Partly because there might be no bubble to burst. He is intelligent enough to know more about the festering underbelly of America than I do.

What’s more, he has probably lived some of them. He should therefore, know about the hypocrisy, the double standards (Gaza on my mind), the institutional imbalances (race on my mind) that the country hides under the cover of the great American dream – its forever catchphrase. That he has elected instead to focus on the many positives of his adopted nation, at least to the outside world, is something to be applauded – and to be recommended. 

Perception is often reality and the saying that you are addressed as you are dressed is based on that. It is as true for individuals as it is for nations and corporate bodies. If you can manage to clothe yourself with raiment of righteousness and greatness, that is what the world would first see before deciding whether it is a false garment or not. This is what the US has mastered over generations. People who have travelled the world might be forgiven if they wonder what the hype is all about on visiting some areas in America.

If, on the other hand, you adorn yourself in negativity then don’t be surprised if you are seen as filthy. An African proverb says if you describe your best garment as a rag, then don’t be dismayed when people use it to wipe the floor. This is what those Nigerians who describe their homestead with the proverbial left hand are not aware of. But it comes to haunt us – and them- on occasions and at several levels.

I see it play out at airports when having the green passport means a greater scrutiny. I see it play out when foreigners develop trust issues with Nigerians. Unfortunately, naturalizing doesn’t necessarily change the stigma. When the chips are down, you are still a Nigerian/American or a Nigerian/British – or whatever country you have adopted- while still inheriting the baggage that comes with the prefix.   

One of my favourite programs on Nigerian TV is that of Nigerians in the diaspora which airs at weekends on Channels TV. The program highlights the achievements of Nigerians in various walks of life in different parts of the world. Many Nigerians have blossomed where fate planted them and have risen to enviable heights in their chosen vocations. I salute them. I salute their resourcefulness and determination to make a mark.

This group of people, has helped to change some of the narratives concerning Nigeria – narratives of drugs, duplicity and corruption. They are our ambassadors. And because many of them still identify with Nigeria, they act as a counter weight to those who no longer identify with the country including those who denigrate the country at every turn. But more importantly for me, these ambassadors in the diaspora have succeeded against many odds – and there are quite a few odds in a foreign land. They have probably succeeded because they developed the mindset to make a difference knowing nothing comes as of right for them in a foreign land.

Everything has to be worked for and worked at. So, each time I hear or read of the feats of Nigerians in the diaspora, including those that made podium appearances for other countries at the recently concluded Olympics, I am reminded instead, of the potentials within Nigeria and Nigerians. Potentials that can come to the fore if we can learn to put Nigeria first. I am also reminded that while there are many things wrong with the country, there are many things right with it. And that many of the things wrong with the country can be corrected by some of the things right with it. It has to do with our mindset and application.

A radio program I accidentally stumbled across last Sunday on my way from church attuned my mind again to some of the main ingredients of success. The first line of the motivational speech said ‘if you want to change the world, you have to make your bed in the morning’. It was an attention grabber which succeeded with me. This catchy line speaks first of all, to laziness – getting up from bed, then to diligence, to application, to charity beginning at home and to getting the foundation right because as you make your bed, so you lie on it.

It speaks to the notion that the change we want should start with us and therefore, the country we want should start with us. A child who cannot keep his little corner clean will not keep a room clean. He should therefore, not expect to be given a room to manage even if he feels entitled to one. A person who starts the day without making his bed is starting out with a mindset of unpreparedness and therefore, of entitlement. He forgets that entitlement is not an ingredient of success.

I will end the article with the old friend and classmate I started it with. He is fond of saying that home is where you feel safe and accepted. He might be right from a perspective and for that reason I have always kept quiet. But I will have to burst at least one bubble today. Home -true home that is- is where the umbilical cord and placenta of your great ancestors are buried.  The Jews, whatever their faults, know this. Rare is the Jew wherever he is domiciled, who uses a left hand to describe his ancestral home. We should learn from them and join hands to ensure Nigeria doesn’t go into disrepair. This includes the naysayers.