Dear Bunmi,

I am in love with a man who is separated from his wife. He has two children and they live with her in the house her new husband provided for her.

He said he was bitter that all the years they were married, she was cheating on him and he finds it difficult to trust any other woman.

• Port Harcourt lady goes dumb after visiting lover in Lagos

I am 26 years old and he is 45. He’s made it clear that all he wants from me is a casual relationship. Do you think he’ll grow to love me if I help him get over his hurt? Or should I leave him?

Vivian, by e-mail.

Dear Vivian,

The man has not given you any reason whatsoever to stay in the relationship. There is a lot of gap between what you want and what he wants that I see only heartache ahead.

You’re very keen on him, he’s less keen on you. You are coming to the relationship with very little unhappy history, he’s suffering from a major trauma that may take him years to get over. You want to spend the rest of your life with him, he wants a casual relationship.

It’s obvious you love this man desperately and that’s one of the reasons you should leave now. The more desperate you feel, the more you are going to get hurt. So, save yourself a lot of heartache, and say goodbye to him now!