Dear Bunmi, 

I know toyboys are the rage these days and they connote the image of a gold-digger. I met this friend’s younger brother at a bank that I use and he’d been after me since then. I’m a single mother of two and fairly comfortable. Even though I’m seven years older, this man and I started a relationship. 

I enjoyed his company and the sex is good. Only he hasn’t asked me for any gifts or money – instead he gives presents that lifts my spirit. Is it a matter of time before he starts milking me? And how far should I go in my generosity? 

READ ALSO:This toy boy is all the tonic I need!

Clair, by e-mail 

Dear Clair,

You won’t be the first woman to be under the spell of a toyboy – there are tons of women in your shoes asking the same question: Does it really work in the bedroom? Here are four good reasons researchers give why a toyboy might prefer maturity over youth: Older women know what they are doing:

They’ve clocked up more lovers so have more experience. Young girls might have breasts that point to heaven, but older women will keep him on cloud nine through sheer sexual knowledge. 

Older women take charge: They’re not afraid to direct on position, pace or for-play, so he’s not left wondering what his lover wants or when she wants it. She’s capable of satisfying her own needs which takes the pressure off him and she doesn’t just lie back and expect him to do all the work.

Older women take their time: It usually takes women longer warm-up than men. She doesn’t apologise for it, knowing a slower sex session is liable to be more enjoyable for both of them. 

Older women are confident: They’re likely to be less inhibited and far less hung up on what people will think if they try something a little unusual.

So make the most of this experience and have fun. Your toyboy works in a bank and is most unlikely to milk you dry for sex! 

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