By Dr. Ugoji Egbujo
There is nothing that hasn’t happened recently. We were told angels were gathering. They were burning with the desire to save Nigeria from a certain apocalypse. But we are now seeing familiar vultures congregating, returning with outstretched necks. And wolves have started coming back, not in sheep’s clothing, but as ravenous wolves.
After all the letters and the righteous tantrums, a retired Obasanjo is backsliding into party politics. The coalition to rescue Nigeria had cried us a river, but it appears the coalition has no ‘liver.’ It’s a hard shell of disgruntled old politicians with a sheen of effete youthful idealists. It has crawled and searched, it has become desperate. So it has in its desperation latched onto the PDP. And the PDP, it once perceived as contemptible, has become its soul.
It isn’t just Obasanjo, the messiah, who is doing seemingly bizarre things. Yes, he once thought no one could be more corrupt than his former assistant, Atiku Abubakar. And he used to believe Jonathan was such a corrupt weakling. Circumstances have reunited them and he has started proclaiming their sanctification. We know Obasanjo. The Nigerian Intervention Movement has activists for whom Obasanjo is not a moral model. They also once thought the PDP was a terminally ill leper. But they are now willing to frolic with a PDP that has not dipped itself in any known River Jordan.
There is nothing that has not happened. The PDP faction that sought refuge in the APC in 2014 are fed up. They say they have lived the last three years as wretchedly as internally displaced persons in Maiduguri. They came as new PDP (nPDP), they are departing as Reformed APC ( R-APC). They are returning to the very PDP they deemed too filthy for habitation. They think the APC is refractory to change. An ungrateful APC, they say, used and dumped them like soiled diapers. In 2014, they had strutted the country like long legged brides—coveted by all. In 2018, they have sneaked around the country in swollen faces of the jilted menopausal, haggling out personal political rewards remorselessly, from an indignant but helpless power-hungry PDP.
While the Reformed APC is looking for a new nest with the anxiety of the homeless, Governor Fayose is doing a Neymar on the eve of governorship elections in Ekiti. Brazilian footballer Neymar clutches his head when his toe is scratched. Fayose smelt tear gas and clutched onto his neck. A video clip has gone viral. It has Fayose weeping in a neck collar. Fayose wanted the public to believe his neck was broken by the police. Dino Melaye wont be happy with Fayose. He has reduced the credibility of the ploy. Dino threatened to commit suicide to punish the police men who came to arrest him. And took refuge in a neck collar to evade the police. But he never cried. If Dino had immunity he would never have misused a neck collar. But Fayose wore a collar, and wept like a hired mourner, only to entice public sympathy.
In 2014, Mr Fayose was the candidate of the PDP. PDP’s humble Goodluck Jonathan was president. Urbane Kayode Fayemi was governor of Ekiti. A few days to the 2014 governorship election in that state, soldiers prevented APC governors from entering Ekiti state. On the eve of that election, many APC officials were mopped up in a raid evidently designed to weaken the party. After the elections, a recording surfaced, Ekitigate was born. It was alleged that Fayose and the PDP used the army and other security agencies to intimidate their opponents and manipulate the 2014 Ekiti governorship elections.
Karma, it appears, loves Ekiti state. It quietly switched roles for the major players in Ekiti. Fayose is now governor. Fayemi has the ears of the president. Suddenly, Fayose, who loves to describe himself as ruthless Peter the Rock, wants the army and the police to maintain neutrality in the interest of peace and unity. He seems troubled by the ghosts of 2014.
The Governor of Sokoto has dissolved his cabinet. He doesn’t want to travel to his new destination with political infidels. With one eye on the presidency, he now speaks like Fayose. He now says that Buhari has been poor. He is a member of the reformed APC that has identified the PDP as the new heaven. The Governor of Benue is relocating too. Many say, after the massacres, no one will vote APC in Benue. The governor has a mountain of unpaid workers salaries. But killer herdsmen have given him a lifeline. When Governor Wike visited and donated 200 million naira to Benue, we all smelt a rat. Because a few months before then he had described Benue’s Governor Ortom as a bumbling idle governor. That was when Ortom went to Rivers to help APC and Rotimi Amaechi.
Governor Rochas Okorocha returned to Owerri after the APC convention dancing ‘shaku shaku.’ Then a court annulled the disputed APC ward congresses conducted by ghosts in Imo. A couple of months ago he run in fright to Daura after the ward congresses were held behind his back. He had seemed a drowning man. The insurrection has been quelled. But it is hoped that he has learnt a few lessons. Imo cannot be privatized without nightmares. Imo won’t let any ‘nwa dishi’ (colonial district officer) come back. And not a black ‘nwa dishi.’
Adeosun has been at loggerheads with the NNPC. FAAC meetings have ended in rancour. NNPC cannot explain how much the nation wastes on petrol subsidy. And just when the minister was standing her ground, someone remembered her national youth service corps exemption certificate. What has been circulated as her exemption certificate looks dodgy. The boys of Oluwole street are more meticulous. What is the signature of a Director General who wasn’t the Director General on the date it was issued doing on that certificate? A quiet Adeosun is now understandably mute. Some say the scandal was orchestrated from within. They claim her neck has been put on the guillotine by the Cabal.
The NYSC Act is now being examined by even bus drivers. And that law quite frankly pretends to be summoning people to compulsory military service, like it’s done in Israel. Who knew it was a criminal offense not to attend NYSC after graduation, even if you remained a housewife. Really? A Nigerian who schooled and lived abroad all his life cannot be appointed to any position until he completes one year NYSC programme even if he returned at 75 years. Since Adeosun applied for an exemption which in truth she stood no legitimate chance of getting, she has to produce the middle man who helped procure her suspicious exemption certificate.