Dear Bunmi,

I recently got married and although I’ve known my  husband for almost three years, I’m not sure I could trust him completely. Some few weeks back, I withdraw some money out of my bank account and hid it at home in a section of my wardrobe. Later, I went to get it and the money had disappeared I asked my husband if he knew anything about it – afterall it’s just the two of us in the flat.

While he didn’t actually confess to taking the money, he promised he’d do all he could to make sure I got all my money back. I know he’s in debt; he’d borrowed money off me a few times. Do I just accuse him outright of stealing, or wait for him to pay the money back before I do?

Ndidi, by e-mail.

Dear Ndidi,
If you suspect your husband of stealing from you, you have to address this and deal with the consequences. If you don’t, how will you be able to trust him again? His response sounds like a tacit admission of guilt to me. I’d be suspicious, both of his motives and ofhis promise to return the money. Since there is no third party, let him know you believe he’s taken your money and that such a behaviour is not on.

It’s sad that an issue of trust will surface at such an early stage of the marriage.
Hopefully, when he realist/he couldn’t get away with such dishonest behaviour, he would behave.


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