By Evelyn Usman

As Nigeria continues its quest for socio-economic development, women have been encouraged to vie for political positions at all levels of government, from local councils to the National Assembly.

This call to action was made by the Chief Responsibility Officer, Mother Gold, Dr. Adeshina Fagbenro-Byron, at the third annual Mental Health Series themed “Rise, Speak, and Renew’, organized by the Victoria Modupe Foundation. at Wemabod Estate in Ikeja, Lagos, in commemoration of International Women’s Day.

Dr. Fagbenro-Byron emphasized the crucial role women play in the health and well-being of a nation, likening their exclusion from decision-making processes to having 50% of one’s body injured or malfunctioning.

He stressed that women’s participation in politics was not just a matter of equality, but also a matter of national interest.

Addressing women at the event, he said : “At least, 50% of the population of every nation are women.
Now, you imagine if 50% of your body is either excluded, injured or maligned in some way. What would happen to the total health of the body? So, if 50% of our women population are disenfranchised and excluded one way or another, what do you think will be the total health of the nation? It will not be as it should be.

“ By excluding women, we limit our problem-solving capacity and hinder our progress.Solution can come from either a man or a woman. So if you exclude women or make them redundant, that means the totality of where your ideas should come from, you have already blocked it. That means you are walking on half speed”.

He stated that the cycle of violence could be broken, if women would embrace the power of affirmation. “Speaking kindly to oneself and others can have a profound impact on mental and emotional well-being. The words we speak to ourselves and others have the power to either bless or injure. Psychological and mental violence can be just as damaging as physical abuse. That’s why it is crucial to start each day with positive affirmations, reminding ourselves of our worth and value.

“Looking in the mirror, with or without makeup, and speaking kindly to yourselves is a fundamental practice. Repeating affirmations, such as those spoken by God, can have a transformative effect on one’s life. By emphasizing the importance of self-affirmation, we can begin to break the cycle of abuse and cultivate a culture of kindness and compassion”, he said.

Earlier in her presentation on Creating the difference between a healthy marriage and an abusive one and the way to handle an abusive marriage , Director, Grace’s Place Shelter,Mrs Debola Oni, urged members of the society to take a stand against abuse and support those affected.

She noted that “ The devastating impact of abuse on victims and their children cannot be overstated. Abusive marriages are not just unhealthy, but also potentially deadly. The mistake we often make is applying advice meant for healthy marriages to abusive ones. Telling a victim to “submit” or “endure” is not only misguided but also enables the abuser.

“The harsh reality is that abusive marriages are not about the victim’s actions, but about the abuser’s issues. No matter how quiet or submissive the victim may be, the abuse will continue. It is essential to recognize the difference between a healthy and abusive marriage and to speak out against abuse. Victims of abuse must be encouraged and supported, whether they choose to stay or leave”.

She stated that the consequences of staying in an abusive marriage were severe. “Victims are unable to fulfill their potential, and children are traumatized, struggling to face the future. Staying also enables the abuser, who is unlikely to change. On the other hand, leaving an abusive marriage also comes with its challenges. It is crucial to provide victims with the necessary support and resources to make informed decisions about their lives.

“As a community, we must create a safe space for victims to share their stories and seek help. By speaking out against abuse, we can work towards creating a society where everyone can live free from fear and violence”. She admonished.

On her part, the second speaker, Dr Ziza Senewo, issued a rallying cry for women to discover their purpose and tap into their inner strength, reminding them that they were not created to be empty or powerless. She emphasized that empowerment was a crucial tool in the fight against abuse, urging women to recognize their worth and learn to appreciate themselves.

Dr. Ziza also encouraged women to develop the courage to walk away from abusive marriages, asserting that they deserved to live free from fear and violence by finding their voices and asserting their autonomy and fulfilling their true potential.

She disclosed that ” As a Psychotherapist, I have seen firsthand the devastating impact of emotional stress and mental health issues on women. In my experience, seven out of ten women struggle with emotional stress, often as a result of domestic violence or the weight of responsibilities placed upon them. These women, often silenced and unable to express themselves, are left to suffer in silence”.

Earlier in her welcome remark, Executive Director ,Victoria Modupe Oke VMO Foundation, Mrs. Lolade Fagbenro-Byron said the event was not just to reaffirm the foundation’s commitment to gender equality, women’s rights, and mental health wellness but a call to action.

She urged Nigerians to take a bold action in support of mental health and women’s empowerment, as well challenge stigma surrounding mental health, by supporting women and girls constrained by societal pressure.

She also called on the need for policy change that would integrate mental health into Nigeria’s primary healthcare system.

The VMO foundation according to her, ” draws strength from the vision of late Ms. Victoria Modupe Oke, Mama Oke —who through her profession as a Radiographer and civil rights activist was a pioneer in good governance and women’s empowerment. Mama Oke dedicated her life to amplifying voices that were often silenced. In 2017, her family and allies established this Foundation with the mission: “No woman left behind, no potential unfulfilled.

“The Victoria Modupe Oke Foundation envisions a Nigeria where no woman battles her inner struggles alone—a Nigeria where our daughters inherit resilience, not regret”, she asserted.