Scholars have attributed the collapse of families to societal challenges in the country, adding that the solution path is to halt the spate of broken homes and ensure peace and tranquility of the family.

Also, the Chief Imam of Lekki Central Mosque, Imam Ridwan Jamiu said moral decadence in the society has led to corruption in high places, the collapse of families, drugs among children, and an unhealthy society.

The scholars who were unanimous in their presentations stated this during the first quarter Dawah workshop organized by Lekki Muslim Umah, LEMU, with a theme: “Towards Happy Marriage” held at Jubrila Ayinla Multipurpose Hall, Lekki Central Mosque last Sunday.

While Prof Fatima Abdulkareem and Imam Najeem Jimoh spoke on the topic “Finding a righteous spouse”; Dr. Rasheedah Oke-Olaniyan and Shaykh Dr Munirdeen Salaudeen, Ar-Riyaadi spoke on the topic ‘How to make Marriage work.’ The chief Imam of LEMU, Imam Ridwan Jamiu interrogated the issue of ‘Marriage Ceremonies: The Islamic Guidelines.’

There is huge moral decline — Imam Jamiu

In his presentation, Imam Jamiu said: “A family is a unit of the society, if the family is sound and healthy, the community will be sound and healthy, and if the family is unhealthy, the community will be unhealthy and this will affect the nation. This is why whenever we have any gathering like this, promoting love and peace in the family, we are promoting peace and national security.

“Many of society’s challenges came as a result of the collapse of the family or marriage breakdown. If you see some children who have taken to drugs, it is because the family has collapsed. There can hardly be successful parenting without successful coupling.

“Some of the reasons parents abandon their children at the mercy of the society is lack of faith even in the face of challenges. For instance, If you truly fear Allah, you wouldn’t go stealing or crime as a solution to your economic challenges. You have to look for other lawful means of seeking wealth. But because there is lack of faith or better still, a spiritual decline, many people are very religious, but are not Godly.

“Some people go to places of worship only because they are looking for jobs and appointments.
Again, there is no robust law that can check these societal issues. If they know that it is a crime to abandon your children, with severe punishment, it will serve as a deterrent to others. Another reason is moral decline, which permeates every sector including those in government. That is why we have cases of corruption everywhere in government. Most people are morally corrupt.

On the issue of gay, Imam Jamiu said, “Homosexuality is not reasonable, even among animals, it is not common. We have some people who are corrupting human nature because they don’t believe in the hereafter. They have also been using that as a tool to control us. That is why they are promoting drugs, cultism. This is one way they use to disintegrate the family.

“They believe if they destroy the family, then they can control people. Because come to think of it, if the traditional family is strong, they can’t control people. That is why they are promoting gay and similar atrocities. Every Muslim should realize we are not here to live forever, we should be thinking about the day we will go back to him, a day we don’t even know. Death is not also the end of it, it is just the beginning of another journey. How we want to use our eternity, we should choose. As Muslims, we don’t have the same philosophy as non-Muslims. Life is just a means, not our goal.

Home training and child’s future

Dr Rashidah Oke-Olaniyan reminded parents of their position as role models, adding that they should think more about the future of their children.

“Parents should know they are role models and they are not planning for now, you are planning for the hereafter. The future of the children is important as well as the Hereafter. Having intimacy is what we don’t always want to talk about, if there is no understanding in the marriage, it is broken already. You have to make your marriage work and healthy.

“Think about the children all the time. When the home is broken, there is no way the woman can be the mother and the father at the same time. It is difficult. Go and ask the kids out there, they will tell you, I need to see my Mum, I need to see my Dad.

“In fact, when there is no father figure in the home, you see the child going out to look for a father figure that may not be right for him or her. If you don’t want society to teach your child, you have to be there to teach your child and by extension, you have to make your marriage work.

“When a man loses his job, if the love is there, if the empathy is there, the woman can pick up a job or find something to do to save the family. There are so many things someone can do, even from home to earn money.

“She must be willing to help the family to augment the finances at home. Also, you should know that this must not affect your home, must not affect the care of your children and husband.
Couples must be source of reminders to righteous deed.”

Imam Nojeem Jimoh, Chief Imam, LightHouse Muslim Community, said: “It is the intention of Allah for couples to be happy in their marriages. It is the primary thing Allah intends for the couple. He says: He permits us to live together in tranquility. The couples must be believers and both fearing must be sources of reminders to the way of Allah. Both playing their roles as enjoined by Allah.

“It is sad to know there are lots of broken homes and marriages, but it is because many of us have gone away from the prescriptions of Allah as far as marriage is concerned. You find husbands and wives competing rather than complementing and cooperating. Allah has not forbidden women to assist in putting food on the table. Women are mostly entangled in social lives,” he said.

Earlier, the chairman of the Ummah, Alhaji M Ninalowo said the topic was chosen to provide solutions to the growing marital challenges plaguing the Muslim Ummah in particular, and the world in general.

According to him, “such marital upheavals include high divorce rate, spousal abuse, unbridled adultery resulting in an alarming rate of paternity fraud, baby mama and baby father syndrome, to mention but a few.

“Undoubtedly, the marriage institution is no longer what it used to be. Many couples, especially young ones, are not happily married,” he said.