By Francis Ewherido
A few Saturdays ago, a friend was doing his usual exercise around his estate. Another man, who was also doing his work out, breezed past him. The other man was walking faster.
For every three laps (about 350 metres) he did, the other man overtook him. By the time he did 13 laps and 40 minutes, he retired, feeling very fulfilled, to have his bath. When he got home, his wife even greeted him, adding to his sense of fulfilment.
But the other guy did 40 or more laps. He started before my friend and my friend retired before him. The other guy appeared older, which puts him in his early 60s, while my friend is 57 years.
My friend could easily have been sad because an older person looked fitter, more agile and has more stamina. But not him; he planned to do only 30 minutes and ended up doing 40 minutes. He wanted to do only 10 laps and ended up doing 13.
These were his targets,and capacity, and he felt much fulfilled achieving and surpassing them. Whatever the other man did was inconsequential to him.
As we talked, my mind wondered off. It is such situations that are fuelling avoidable high blood pressure, stroke, depression and suicide in our society. We live in a competitive world, no doubt, but life is not always like competitive sports, where there are winners and losers, with the accompanying celebrations of triumph and agony of defeat.
Life, much of the time, can be win/win for everyone. God created everyone a winner. It all boils down to knowing why God created you. It starts with finding your purpose in life. Someone asked, “How can I know why God created me. I see God ask?”
You do not have to physically see God. If you look into your life, your passions, your talents and those positive things you love doing, your purpose is somewhere within? This is how God shows many of us our purpose.
All you need to do is clean up, chip and polish the rough diamond and the dots begin to connect. Certainly, God will not come down to help you develop your talents or passions.
Once you know your purpose and what you want, you run your life’s race and maintain your lane. This mind-set permeates all aspects of your life. Too many people benchmark their lives against the lives of others without their own parameters.
We are in a global village, so I am not advocating living your life in a watertight compartment. You must learn and borrow a few things from people around you, our immediate environment and far-flung people and places via audio-video sources and written words.
But when that is done, there is a fundamental core, which has been formed in line with your life’s purpose. This fundamental core determines what you read or watch, what you accept or reject and guides your entire decision-making process.
Consequently, before you set out on a journey/mission, you should have goals, which of course must be SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-defined).
These goals, and not the accomplishments of others, become your compass. Even after you set your SMART goals, it is not a do-or-die affair. We set goals as humans, but we sometimes do not know what God wants for us.
I believe that misalignment of the human wishes and divine providence sometimes prevents us from achieving some of our goals. Unfortunately, this has also become a reason for depression, pain, anger, disappointment and, in extreme cases depression, death via heart attacks and other ailments and suicide.
After doing your homework and putting in your best and things do not work out, what do you do? Disappointment and pains are normal, but, for me, seek the face of God, lift and dust yourself up and move on. Dem nor dey die put. I nor get shoe, I nor get shoe, you never see people when nor even get leg to wear shoe?
In running your life’s race, if your goal is to build a bungalow. Once you achieve that, case closed. You do not worry about somebody else whose goal is to build a mansion and has achieved his goal.
As far as goal setting is concerned, you are both winners. If you decide to also build a mansion later, it is now a new goal. If your goal is to have only three children and you have achieved it, do not look in the way of your neighbour with six children.
Do you know what it takes to properly house, feed, clothe, educate and generally provide for six children in these very good times? If your ambition is to drive a Honda Accord and you now have it, do not bother about that other road user who glided past you effortlessly in his Range Rover Sport.
Na so the matter just be. The most important things are: do you know your purpose in this life? Have you set goals to achieve your life’s purpose? Do you set goals for all your activities and work towards achieving these goals?
People worry themselves over nothing. Your neighbour’s children attend a primary school where they pay N2m per annum and your children attend a primary where you pay N500,000 per annum and it becomes an issue and a source of worry.
Sometimes spouses fight over this non-issue. One spouse might feel that the neighbours’ children, who are attending a more expensive school, are superior to his/her children.
My question, “wetin primary one and two children dey learn sef? And this one you are killing yourself, what about the children attending government schools? You think the children in private schools will be better than them in future?
Wait and see. Please study your children’s character and help them to evolve to become successful instead of worrying yourself over nothing.
Another factor that helps people to run their race and maintain their lane is contentment. Your penis is six inches when erect. It is performing all the functions it was created for optimally.
Yet, you still feel inadequate. You want it to be 12 inches. Who are you going to be mating with, a horse? It is because of people like you that the “miracle” penis enlargers have mushroomed all over the place. By the way, I have not been seeing their adverts like before.
I guess the Corona Virus Pandemic has taken penis enlargement from the zenith of men’s hierarchy of needs. Some women have also had their natural bums destroyed because of bum enlargements that went horribly wrong. Also, some people have died in the process of doing tummy tuck.
When you know your race, run it and keep to your lane, you run a good race and live a fruitful and fulfilling life. It is your race, so whenever you finish, you come first. Everybody, who runs his race, comes first. Only those, who run other people’s race come second, third…….behind owners of the race.