June 13, 2020

Secrets of my 5 year old marriage to Director Mattmax – Deola Aina

Secrets of my 5 year old marriage to Director Mattmax – Deola Aina

By Rita Chioma

Deola Aina is a popular Nigerian makeup artist and photographer happily married to famous Nigerian music video director, Matthew Abiodun Aina AKA Director Mattmax.

The creative multi-talented artist had recently announced the expectation of her new books on weight loss and successful relationship tips.

Deola Aina is also set to launch her Cosmetics brand, Deola Aina Cosmetics, her Fashion line, Deola Aina Vogue, and her non profit Foundation, Deola Aina Cares, all before the end of 2020.

Deola shares with Vanguard News her love story, how to stay married and happy to a celebrity and lots more.

How did you meet your husband?

We met on a music video set. I’d been longing to work with him for long, after working with different other creative directors like Adasa Cookey, Patrick Elis, Clarance Peters, Moe Musa, Mex Films, Sesan Ogunro, to mention but a few.

Mattmax finally called me one day for a shoot. He mentioned he got my number from an artist. I was amazed the moment he told me how excellent my jobs were, even to the point of telling me couples of it he saw on TV. His complements were breathe taking; a whole Director Mattmax calling me for job! To cut the story short, I told him I was available and gave him my rates. I actually over charged him because it was an impromptu job.

He told me he’ll call back in an hour. Shockingly after a long wait, he never called. I decided to call him instead but he never answered my calls; neither did he return it. Seven months later, another artist friend Kelvin Boj (Laylow) booked me as official makeup artist for his video shoot. I went with one of my best students, Bisola. Up till date I take my students along whenever I have a job. I see it as an avenue for them to learn and get first class practical knowledge on how to work with different client, celebrities, artistes and vixens. In short, to my surprise Director Mattmax was the one directing the video! I put in extra efforts like I normally do on every job I get.

The makeup of the five vixens  was on point. “Wow, I love this, the makeup is flawless!” that was his remark the moment the vixen hit the set. That moment I felt on top of the world. Nothing in this world makes me happy than getting good remarks as such from my clients. I would say that one job gave me a ticket to work for him as his official makeup artist. Automatically I became part of his team, from there we became friends and the rest is history.

What attracted you to him in the first place? He is easy to communicate with. He is loving, understanding and hard-working among other good qualities. I married my best friend.

What’s the secret of your union for the past 5 years?

For me, I think it’s the fact that we have a deep foundation, “You’ve got to find the right person. It’s powerful, but simple.” The best part of being married to my husband is being completely understood. We always work toward finding mutual understanding—which is predicated on respect—as the foundation of our love.

My husband and I understand each other completely. Sometimes, there are  few arguments but we always resolve them in love and as a friend. We have learnt to understand each other better and spend more time together. Friendship, love, mutual respect and understanding each other are key ingredients of a successful marriage. Also, it is important to be prayerful as partners. I have someone whom I can talk to about anything and someone whom I care more about than I’ve cared about anybody and we know each other better than anybody. We stay together because we love each other.

Can you remember a specific moment in time when you knew you would end up marrying Director Mattmax?

I distinctly remember one of the first times he called me, I think we talked for almost five hours straight on the phone. After the call, I said in my mind, “I could marry that guy!” From our first phone conversations, we were never at a loss for words and we talked about deep things right from the start. He could hold his own in a conversation and that meant a lot to me.

When you said “I do,” could you imagine that you’d still be married 5 years later? Do you think you fully comprehend what it meant?

I hoped that we would, but honestly I had no idea! We had a lot of naysayers surrounding us when we got married—so many people only gave us one or two years tops. I think we both went into marriage with the idea of forever (as both of our parents had long-time marriages) but we were also realistic and knew that without commitment, it wouldn’t last.

What aspect of marriage are you most pleasantly surprised by?

The comfort and security of a long-time partner. It is always good to know that you have someone in your corner who loves you, who you can count on to be there for you through thick and thin—and to know that your spouse will comfort you when you need comforting and celebrate with you when something good happens. Knowing that your partner cares about what happens to you is everything.

What do you think is the most challenging part of being married?

Managing the pressures of life and your own personal “stuff” as well as your partner’s day-to-day cares and worries. Your life can be going okay and your partner is struggling with something and you can’t escape that (and vice versa). It can be hard at times. Also, recognizing that we have different needs and learning how to compromise and balance it all out.

What’s one thing that your husband does that makes you feel glad you married him 5 years ago?

He loves me unconditionally. He would do anything I asked him to do (within reason!) and he will never hesitate to do something that he knows will makes me happy or help me out. When I see myself through his eyes, I see just how much he loves me, and it makes me love him even more. He is my biggest cheerleader and always encourages me to go after my dreams.

What advice do you have for couples about to tie the nut?

I don’t know if there is a key piece of advice for I’m still new in this institution called marriage myself but one thing I know for sure is that it is important to marry someone with whom you share the same values. My husband and I would never have lasted as long as we have if we didn’t value each other and our family above other things. Life requires a lot of patience and trusting that everything will be okay. Learn to forgive and not to keep score. Everyone can be difficult to live with at times—learning to move on is very important. Let go of angry feelings as fast as possible. Forgive yourself when you feel that you have not lived up to your standards.


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