By Epiphenia Muolokwo
A quick look at this scenario: You’re pretty – at least that’s what everyone says, and you’ve got this not so fine, not so rich guy who’s been on your neck for the past five years. Yeah! You’re right. That’s creepy! He wouldn’t stop. He seems to always have his ways around getting your contact details.
You block him on Whatsapp, he finds you on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, name it – just everywhere! You just don’t know how he does it. You’re beginning to feel upset.
Warding off guys, depending on how hot a chick you’re (Haha), may sound somewhat easy, ‘Easy-peasy’. With a pale or unpleasant countenance could work, you may think. Not so for many guys.
Well, In real life, many ladies face this problem all the time. Especially, those we may have given our number to, voluntarily. Don’t give up so easily. Sometimes, you may give out your contact to someone who may appear nice but later you find out you are not into the guy. You show that you’re not interested but he can’t get it. The more you try to ward him off the more he persists. What do you do?
The most conventional method is by telling the guy off nicely or flicking the block button. But what if you flick that button and they end up getting to you through a different route?
More and more creative ways have, over the years, been developed by women. Some have turned effective to some of us women.
On the ‘billing method’ which happens to be the most effective for me, I’m going to tell a story. It’s a personal experience about my recent encounter. You know there are these kinds of people you see and it just dawns on you right there and then, that you don’t like them. It’s safe to call it ‘dislike at first sight’. Well, this guy ticked all the boxes. From how weirdly he starred at me from a distance, to his outfit and the way he talked. He didn’t even smell nice. Thank goodness he didn’t have a bad breath. Nevertheless, he gave me every reason to dislike him on sight.
He approached me regardless. Of course there isn’t a way he could have known that he was already disliked on sight. “You’ve a really good height”, he said as he grabbed a seat nearby to sit adjacent to me. “I love girls as tall as you, I’ve been watching you since you walked in”, he added.
I smiled, looked at him and said “thank you”, just so I don’t appear rude. Some friends were also in the small gathering and it ought to be an interesting evening. Far from it for me. His concentration on me fouled the atmosphere to me while others were having good times with the drinks and chops. He continued with a lot of uninteresting talks. Monosyllabic replies followed. It didn’t make him to stop and face elsewhere. He rather got inspired to ask me about traveling for the Christmas holiday. He had been told I was from his state. That probably inspired him. But that irritated me the more. You met somebody in one evening outing and gbaam, you’re asking the person to travel home for Chirstmas with you. I know a few may fall for this but not many. But I had had enough and it was time to throw in the Billing Method since all my attitudes failed to send the message. I then demanded a return flight ticket and many other things I needed to sort out before travelling. Those things required money. Yes, I said I needed money to sort the problems before I could travel.
The billing method is when you throw a bunch of pathetic stories so you could get some bucks from a guy. Money and such stories are usually a turn off for men. It comes handy especially for the ones you just met and don’t really care about and who wouldn’t read all your nice rebuffs. It works like magic. It did for me on the night. His countenance changed. He didn’t want to show me, but I smelled it. Yes! It worked. I almost went in a full gloat mode, but then, I’d appear weird. He stopped smiling, mumbled one one or two things, faced the other guys and shortly after he left the gathering. It was a good-bye to nuisance. It worked like magic! Haha!
I know that many girls use this method. And I figured running a teeny-tiny survey on this could revela more experiences.
“I’ll tell him plainly, I believe if he’s responsible enough, he’d know I’m not interested but if not I’d give him some attitude,” Josephine said who said she likes being blunt to ward off guys she doesn’t like. Another, Nwendu from PortHacourt told her story this way:
“While I was in school… There was this guy who was really into me and liked showing it. He even told his friends he liked me and all that…. People all around him knew he liked me… But I didn’t like him at all. He was a known cultist but professed pure love and all that. It was a no no for me, because he would always say he would marry me, but when he approached me, I told him I appreciated his love but that I would not reciprocate as I was in a relationship with someone else… He didn’t bulge, he kept professing and showing love and in some cases it was irritating to me as I didn’t feel anything for him.
That’s how I blacklisted him, didn’t pay him much attention, started withdrawing from him constructively. I took his calls but with an I don’t care tone… It still took him time for him to digest the fact that I didn’t want him… But gradually I think the love faded away. When it did, We became just friends. He would borrow my notes in class, call me, check on me but with no intimate talks. We still chat and talk till date….
So I believe time and my attitude towards him warded him off.
Bube from Enugu put hers this way: “I will tell him outright, but first I’ll give him signs, stop picking his calls, give excuses. If he still doesn’t get the drift, I’ll politely tell him that I wouldn’t do anything with him.
But then, if he starts proving stubborn I’ll block his line and on all social media connected to me. If I mistakenly bump into him on the road, I’ll not even behave like I’ve seen him before; walk up to me and I’ll disgrace you!”
“Just Ask him for money.
Tell him you need a loan of N1million Naira to kick start a project,” said Uche from Onitsha. “Uncle will start yapping on about how money is not everything, but you have to stand your ground and tell him that you love money.
Keep singing it into his unfortunate ears, in no time, he will disappear. It
works wonders for me all the time!”
For Oby in Lagos, “Just ask him for money you know he can’t afford, tell him its urgent and that the universe will take care of the rest for you. I met this guy who wouldn’t stop bugging me even after I politely told him I wasn’t interested. So I had to tell him I needed 300 thousand naira urgently for a business. He never called my line again till date.
Since then, the billing method became my trick. At most they will tag me materialistic or gold digger but I will have my peace,” said the Lagos girl.
“ First of all I will be honest with him about how I feel but if he insists, I’ll become extremely aggressive and rude to him,” Naya said from Enugu.
I’ll stop picking up his calls and start doing those things I know he doesn’t like or things I wouldn’t normally do.
Read the warding off method from Nelo in Abuja: “This is funny but has worked for me.
I would first politely tell him but if he insists I’ll tell him that I told my mum about him and that after praying my mum said he was not the right guy for me or that I was not the right girl for him.
Thanks to pepper sprays and tasers, we can deal with creeps who go on a full blown stalking mode and deem it fit to go violent. We don’t hesitate to use those ‘beautiful’ defense devices on them. But should it get to that before some men get the message?
Written by Epiphenia Muolokwu