December 29, 2019

Why I don’t want to marry or have children of my own – Monalisa Stephen

Why I don’t want to marry or have children of my own – Monalisa Stephen

By Ayo Onikoyi

When plus size model, fashion designer and stylist, Monalisa Stephen shared a post on her Instagram page that she’s under 30 and not planning to get married or have kids, she was assailed with comments of outrage and disbelief.

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But when Potpourri reached out to her to private chat her, she seems to have it all figured out and with good reasons of her own too.

“Most people think it’s abnormal not to have your own flesh and blood and they think I took this decision because of my past relationship/heartbreak. Even someone personally chatted me and said she hopes I will find time to heal from what I am going through, blah blah, but this is a decision I took when I was 15, even though I am in my 20s but I relate well with older people and they thought me a lot of good things which changed my approach to life decisions and situations,” she said.

Speaking further, Monalisa explained why she has taken the decision not to marry or have children of her own, reiterating that she loves children.

“ I love children a lot. When I was a teenager I would volunteer to go Care Homes and work since I don’t have money to give them and till now I still do it. Not to blow my trumpet or anything I just love caring for children and I know how it feels not to have parents. I lost my dad when I was one and my mum some few years ago and it’s still affecting me. So, my decision not to have my own kids is due to my experience and the fact that there are millions of kids out there who deserve to be in a good family , who need to experience genuine family love and care. And I will not hesitate to give that chance to 2 kids , help them educationally, mentally and spiritually with the help and grace of God,” she quipped.

Monalisa, who sees herself as an advocate of body positivity and children adoption discounted any notion of any issues, medical or otherwise, of having children or sustaining a relationship, adding that none of such has anything to do with her resolve.

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“I am fertile and I have never had a man problem for a day in my life. This is something I want to do from my heart. It’s a goal. And I hope there are young people like me who have the same mindset to help motherless children see that they deserve maximum love and happiness and I hope that the society will realize that there is nothing wrong with adoption. People don’t understand but I see a bigger picture, I am challenging the norm in a misogynistic environment, so it’s normal for them to think I am weird,” she declared and added that she’s not unwilling to have a man in her life provided the man won’t resort to forcing her into marriage or having children.