By Seun Adigun
The Hay’s lives just around the corner on 3, soundton street, west Neverlands. They are quite a pack who’s got everything going good for them. The couple makes sure of it and it’s not hard to see how happy they are. 

Somewhere close, on the same street lives the Bees. They are all shade of everything regular, the everyday regular kinda couple.

The two Mrs’ sometimes meet at the Tee’s salon every other week, during which times Mrs Bee can hardly keep her eyes off the ever glowing Mrs Hay.

Every day she prays to God that her marriage would one day come to be something close to the bliss the Hays enjoy.

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She wished like Mr Hay, her husband would sometimes take her shopping, buy her gifts, take her out for dinner, lend a helping hand at home, just make her feel loved and special. How she longed to be shown love but Sam just didn’t notice her misery.

She knows the Hays are wealthy the reason it’s easy to afford those luxury dates, trips, and fancy things. But she also knows that more than it requires money, it requires more eyes that see and a heart that feels.

Every day she prays her husband sees and come to understand, maybe then he’ll try and make the change. She wishes they would both learn to live life and not the other way round.

In one of those down times several weeks later, a friend comes visiting and she shares her deepest pains and yearnings

‘’I think I’m losing it’’ she turns to her friend eyes blurry with tears.

“I’m just 35 years old but I already look like a grandma, just look at me’’ the tears flowed….

“I wonder why life has to be so unfair. Look at Mrs Hay, does she have two heads? Really I think Sam doesn’t just care.”
Deep in thoughts Mrs Cici tries to talk her friend out of the sadness. But she didn’t dare tell her she shares her thoughts and feelings, at least ‘not today’ she thought.

‘Today I’ve got to be a friend’ Mrs Cici nod as the counsellor in her goes to work to put in a few words… she says.

“Not everything that glitter is gold. And most times what you see outside doesn’t truly represent the true picture of what is inside.

That you see Mrs Hays glowing doesn’t mean she’s happy o. see, I know a friend of Mrs Fadipe who lives behind the printing press, down the road. she drives the latest cars, and uses all the fancy things you can think of, I’m sure you know her yet, her husband beats her up every time… So you see, don’t be fooled o. better be thankful for your own o. Be contented with what you have.’’

‘’Hmmm it’s true o… Thank you Oremi’’ Mrs Bee sighs thoughtfully and drops the discussion.

Unfortunately today, Mrs Bee is learning to be contented with her reality, living in misery.

What a life.

And I’m wondering, for how long?

Since when has mediocrity become acceptable?

But truth is, it will always be to the complacent.

Several months ago, I stumbled on a story which went viral on social media streets. Vaguely I remember the story centred around two couples. One of the wives compared her marriage with the other couples. Perhaps you read the story too.

While I cannot fully relate it as it goes, the lesson therein lingers – contentment.

A particular line explains how one husband usually opens the car door for his wife and another wife was envious of the woman whose husband did this. Who wouldn’t be?
The writer at the end of it all insinuates that the supposed romantic gesture by that husband wasn’t actually intended as painted. The car door was actually faulty and that necessitated his coming down to open the door each time.

Phewwww… (Blows out)

You see, I quite understand the moral behind the story and I find it excellent too but, I am a bit more concerned because somehow for some not too matured, one faced persons, it downplays the realness, importance and substance of romance in marriage.

Too often, I hear people regarding the true acts of love, romance as fluke.

I will say, many are misconstruing complacency for contentment.
Alas they are two differing words.

While contentment is a feeling of quiet happiness, complacence is a feeling of satisfaction with oneself or achievements accompanied by unawareness of actual dangers or deficiencies.

The formal is great for a happy life, but the latter is recipe for unhappiness. It shouldn’t be allowed to set in at any phase in the journey, as it cripples the will to make things better.

When allowed, it makes people, couples close their minds to the concept of happily ever after. The possibilities of a happy marriage becomes a mirage, and anyone working to make that happen is seen as unreal.

Isn’t it also the reason it’s ever so convenient to console ourselves while celebrating our lapses?

…Why it’s so easy to make excuses for our unwillingness to change?

And why happiness, true love, bliss sounds too good to be true?

Well I guess it’s because some don’t see themselves deserving it. Some are not willing to try or we just don’t find our partner worthy of that kind of life. Whatever it is, it’s great to keep in mind that as we lay our beds, so we lay on it.

Whatever we sow, we’ll reap.

You see, your relationship may not be like the fairy tale kind but, it can be better if you want it to be. It may not always be dry but you can always try.

‘No harm in trying’ they say.

Again, you may not think the Hollywood kind of love is doable but some couple out there are making a trial and are getting better for it. That someone thought of it makes it achievable…only if you will try.

When others won’t give it a thought, give it a try.

When others won’t help with the chores, give it a try.

When others ignore their needs, get busy with it.

When others prefer to watch, get involved.

When others won’t try, try.

Let them be where they are, but let your marriage be to them a fairy tale.
It is possible.

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