By Bunmi Sofola
Philco was very reluctant to serve as the ‘Outback’ town she was posted for her youth service. “I’s in one of those states that you know make up the country but which you never imagined you would ever visit”, she recalled.”A group of us had tried to pull strings and influence our postings and I’d been assured the furtherest I’d be posted to was Oyo State, Lagos was my first choice.
So when the postings came out and I was flung into a town in the far North, I wept. My parents were angry and demanded their money back from the chap who made empty promises about getting better postings but he simply disappeared. I had no choice but to make the most of what I thought was a bad situation.
“It was during our orientation weeks that a group of us got together from time to time to hit the social circuit. Peter and Seye were members of the group and had been friends since their university years. Peter was the sexier friend though, with a roughish smile and tall physique that charmed all the girls – including me. Yet despite our closeness, Peter never hit on me. Instead we became very good friends. I was a bit disappointed but what could I do?
“In the meantime, he was always cheating on all his girlfriends and breaking their hearts, I was lucky not to be part of his conquests! Towards the end of our service year, though, things changed. Peter saw me home from Seye’s birthday part and we were both drunk.
There was also that sad feeling that we would soon be gong back to our various states. That must be the reason why we suddenly found ourselves in each other’s arms, with Peter paying me sexy compliments. The love making that followed was great and he slept over. The following morning, he was dressed and out of he door before he could make further commitments. Days later, I fumed as |I watched him getting off with another girl. But I calmed down later. He was being himself and I really valued our friendship.
“He got a very good job and decided to stay. We all went back to Lagos and I saw a lot of Seye. From time to time, Peer would come down for the weekend and he was the first of the group to own a car. Seye and I continued to get closer and closer. He wasn’t a womaniser like Peter and he was eager to settle down. We fell in love and decided to get married. Peter was to be the best man. When I rang to ell him, he sounded a bit sad! How could he be, he was the happy-go-lucky guy! We might have had a one-night fling, but he was the one who pretended it never happened.
“Nine years of married bliss and three kids later, Peter finally found another good job in Lagos and came down to stay alone. He was divorced and left his ex-wife and two kids behind. It was at this time that Seye’s father died. His mum really took it badly and Seye had to constantly be with the family as they planned the funeral. Even after that, Seye was always at his mum’s to see she was alright.
One night, with Seye staying with his mum yet again, Peter dropped by for a visit. He had two bottles of wine he said he intended to share with us both but we ended up drinking the lot alone – we were truly slushed by this time. ‘You know I really regret the way I treated you before”, he blurted, `I wish things had worked out differently and we had gotten married’. Was he drunk? `I always fancied you’, he continued, `but I was young and stupid. It was when you called you were getting married I realised the type of fool I’d been …’
“I was nonplussed. He fancied me? He leant across the sofa and pressed his lips on mine. All those feelings I’d thought wee forgotten crept up as I kissed him back. We ended up making endless love on the sofa before I hurriedly asked him to leave before Seye showed up. As he was leaving, Seye rang, he would be spending the night at his mum’s to help her sort out a few details. Smiling mischievously, Peter led me to our guest room and it was exhilarating to finally live out all my sexual fantasies with him.
“After more than 12 years of simmering sexual tensions, this was long overdue! `We probably shouldn’t have let our emotions run riot like that’, I teased as Peter got ready to leave, a satisfied smirk on his face. `But I’m glad it happened, I told him. He agreed but warned Seye must never find out. I assured him my husband wouldn’t – I loved him too much to break his heart. And my marriage was too solid than the fickle one |Peter had and got out of!
“That was the only time I strayed and I’ve even helped Seye work through his grief for his dad. Peter is still our good friend. Only, once in a while, Peter and I will swap secret smiles and I know he too is treasuring that wild, forbidden night … To his credit, he didn’t bother to hit on me again, and I respect him for that.”
As I’ve often warned, your closest friend is the most likely culprit to lure your partner into bed. And their secret is usually safe as long as either of them don’t want to be caught!
All you need to know about various STDs
Chlamydia is the most common sexual infection among young people. It is caused by an organism passed during sex, and is treated with antibiotics. Genital Herpes is a painful condition which involves blisters forming on the vulva. When they burst, they become raw, shallow sores. Fifty per cent of people who suffer from this will experience recurring attacks. Although there is no cure, outbreaks can be helped by aspirins and antibiotics.
Genital warts are small warts inside the vagina which can be caught from other people or even spread from warts on the hand. They are easily treated by a doctor who will cover them with anti-wart paint.
Gonorrhoea, also known as the clap, is caused by bacteria passed during penetrative or oral sex. It’s treated with antibiotics and often no symptoms occur in women.
HIV, the virus which causes AIDS, can be passed through unprotected vaginal or anal sex. If you’re sleeping with more than one partner, you should always use a condom to protect yourself. NSU or urethritis is an infection of the urethra – the tube urine passes through. Eighty per cent of sufferers are men, so unprotected sex carries a risk of infection. It’s treated with antibiotics.
Trichmonas vaginalis is a bi like thrush. However, the discharge is usually heavier, will smell unpleasant and may be a greenish/yellow colour. It’s treated with tablets.