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He can’t handle his booze

Dear Bunmi,

I think my boyfriend has a drink problem but he insists he doesn’t. I love him so much and we seem made for each other – until he gets drunk. I am 26 and he’s 28. We’ve been together for a year and I stay at his flat most weekends. After dinner most evenings, we share a bottle of wine. Then he gets out the whisky and can’t stop. That’s when he changes.


He shouts at me, smashing glasses and plates. The next morning, he’ll be crying and saying he’s sorry. He claims it’s nothing to do with drink. He’s obviously in denial.

When The Grass Next Door is Definitely Greener!


by e-mail.

Dear Pelumi,

He won’t admit to himself his bad behaviour has to do with alcohol but you have to be straight with him. Tell him that when he’s been drinking, his behaviour becomes frightening and violent. There can be no more apologies and no more excuses. The drinking simply must stop. Unfortunately, most drinkers who are in denial find it difficult to give up alcohol. If, after all efforts to make him cut back fail, you have to seriously consider cutting your losses.


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