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I have a crush on my best friend’s brother

By Aunty Julie

Aunty Julie,

I think a shameful thing has happened to me. I have a crush on my best friend’s brother. I’m 18 and he is in his 20s. I’ve known him and my best friend since I was 10 and I started to like him when I was 12, just because we talk to each other so much and make each other laugh. There was a time where I was at my best friend’s house and she went to have a shower and I was outside and he came outside and we talked and started laughing and playing basketball and having a good time. I just haven’t ever met a guy like him.


Recently he asked me out and I didn’t know what to say at the time so I told him I’d think about it which was stupid cause I have a massive crush on him, but I know my best friend would hate it and it would be awkward for us. I still haven’t gotten back to him about hanging out. Should I?

Ufuoma, Edo

Dear Ufuoma,

I think you did the right thing by telling your best friend’s brother you’d think about it. I don’t think it’s stupid. You’ve got a lot to consider before you take any action here, and you clearly are a good friend.

If you want to go out with this guy, you need to talk to your best friend about what is going on because it wouldn’t be right to start anything up behind her back. She’d just end up feeling betrayed by her brother and her best friend.

So, tell this guy that you are interested but need some time to talk to your friend about it. He should understand this if he wants to do the right thing by his sister. Just be honest with her and see what she says. She may initially be shocked or against the idea, but if you tell her how you feel, hopefully she will come around to the idea. Her brother could even talk to her too, just so she understands that this is something that matters to both of you.

It may take her some time, but if she just can’t feel comfortable about it, you will need to decide whether it is worth damaging or even losing your friendship with her to be with him.



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