By Bunmi Sofola

Dear Bunmi,

I am just 30 and have a high sex drive. I want it every day if I could get it, but my wife is happy with two or three times a week. Once in a while, she humours me by letting me have more, but I always have the feelings she does it for peace.

A few weeks back, her father had a stroke. He’s lived alone since he lost his wife three years ago and my wife had to go to the family house every evening from work. By the time she came back home, sex was the last thing from her mind.


In the meantime, our neighbour, who is a very good friend of ours, is a single mother of three. She’d jokingly complained of abstaining from sex due to no fault of hers. So when she called round and discovered I was alone, she went back to her place to bring me something to eat. I provided the booze.

One thing led to another and I found myself having amazing sex! She’s in her 40s but sexy and very athletic. Afterwards, she suggested I call in at her place from time to time for no-strings sex. She said it would solve both our problems and my wife needs never know.

I’ve taken her up on her offer and the nice arrangement is working for both of us. I mean what could be simpler and where’s the harm?
I love my wife and our beautiful children, but not getting enough sex is driving me up the wall. Could this be a way of solving my problem and my neighbour’s?

Donald, by e-mail.

Dear Donald,
You might think you’re on to a good thing and so is your neighbour. She might claim she’s only after no-strings sex, but don’t be fooled. Once she’s got her claws into you, she won’t let you go in a hurry.

She’s likely to start making emotional demands on you. She may even let something slip to your wife. If she doesn’t, you wife is bound to pick up tell-tale signs that you’re having it off with her so-called friend.

You’re happy with your marriage and need to talk to your wife about your sexual urges. Twice or thrice a week is okay for married couples. She even allows you to have more once in a while.
For the sake of your marriage, you need to control your sexual urges or be prepared to throw away a good marriage for cheap thrills.


Comments expressed here do not reflect the opinions of vanguard newspapers or any employee thereof.