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Men fool themselves that it is fun going out with married women

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By Bunmi Sofola

FROM time to time, I get letters from you readers that are so interesting that I feel I ought to share them with the rest of you. A few days back, a letter simply signed “Iyabode” landed on my desk and I couldn’t help chuckling to myself as I read it. She wrote: “Dear Bunmi, I am one of the regular readers of your articles in The Vanguard every Sunday and I do not even know how fully I can express my feelings about your articles. If I may tell you, they have really improved my lifestyle and I always make copies available to friends whenever the need arises, Bunmi, I shall be grateful if you can please help write something one of these days on: Why men of today prefer married women as girlfriends. Honestly speaking, it is a vogue in town these days. Please help emphasize on the following points:

Class: This set of married women are known for their own class. Most of them are wives of rich and notorious men. These men also go out at all times with extremely younger girls, leaving their wives and kids at home, thinking that money can fix everything, forgetting about love and happiness.
Sex: This category of ladies preferred by men because they do have wide sexual experiences and they are very safe as they don’t pester the men for marriage.

Fashion: These ladies are very fashion conscious. They are seen in designer dresses and at beauty parlours. They do not mind how much they spend on manicures, pedicures and professionally applied make-up all in order to look impeccably groomed. Not to talk of ridiculously expensive hair extensions. They are also seen in various body shops where they do expensive keep fit exercises. This set of ladies have all the time in the world to look after themselves as a result of their husbands not staying at home most of the time. Their main achievement is to dress to kill so that other men could admire them.

Committing adultery

Conclusion: Most of these ladies do commit adultery mainly to spite their husbands who are noted for their indiscretions. They (the ladies) have all the time to have fun outside their matrimonial homes whenever their husbands are out hunting. They just believe in the saying that;
Advice: Bunmi, please advise us all that in as much as you are not encouraging this type of attitude amongst us, men must be advised and warned to please do anything they do in the name of fun in moderation because women of today will never allow them (the men) to have their cake and eat it all. Gone are the days of our mothers when Aro Mental Hospital, Abeokuta, was packed full of female patients who have problems. Ladies of nowadays are not ready for that kind of ego. The reverse in fact is now the case.

Please help expatiate on this subject of married women and their lovers. And let us for once bring out fright in these our hard-hearted men. After sounding all that warning, dear lyabode, there is precious little left of the topic for me to expatiate on. Over the years and from time to time, I have touched on similar issues but it seems our men are just bent on living on the dangerous fast lane. As you rightly observed, it takes two to tango. The women too aren’t exactly innocent of the offence. In fact, they are the bait that keeps men always rushing to the hook. All we have to do really is cross our fingers. Who knows, the Vogue; might die out after the novelty wears off!

To help you get pregnant faster

RECOGNISING the fact that trying for a baby can quickly become an obsession, nutritional health expert, Marilyn Glenville has written a book to help couples boost their fertility in just three months. According to her, no matter what you do, you might not get pregnant without the right help, “knowing you are doing everything you can will allow you to get on with the rest of your life and, importantly, enjoy baby-making”, she says. Here is a selection of the tips she gave in her book: Getting Pregnant Faster:

Change your diet: Good nutrition means eating healthily at least 80 percent of the time without cutting out any food groups. Keep your weight in check and blood sugar levels balanced so your reproductive hormones work
You: Getting your five a day of fruit and veg will ensure good levels of fertility -boosting antioxidants like Vitamins C and E.
Him: Eat foods high in zinc such as eggs, apricots, vegetables and dried fruit to boost sperm production. Vitamin C can increase sperm count by stopping the sperm clumping together.

Lead a healthy lifestyle: Cutting out cigarettes and alcohol is essential but other factors are as important.
You: Exercise daily to help regulate your menstrual cycle and encourage regular ovulation. but don’t overdo it – not more than 15 hours per week. Get at least six or seven hours undisturbed sleep to boost your libido and prevent hormonal imbalance.

Him: Don’t binge on alcohol. A single drinking session can wipe out your sperm count for months. Come home sober for sex instead and do it often! Abstaining for even a week reduces sperm quality and chances of fertilization.
Go green: Having spider plants, geraniums and peace lilies around can help extract fumes, chemicals and smoke from air.
You: Get some plants for home and work. A walk in the park every day will boost your oxygen level.

Him: Never use a laptop on your lap as it raises the temperature of the testes by about 2.8 degrees Celsius. Just one-degree increase reduces fertility by 40 percent.

Check for infections: If left untreated Chlamydia can spread
to the womb, ovaries and fallopian tubes.
You: Up to 70 percent of infected women don’t realize they have it because there are no noticeable symptoms, so take a test.

Him: Any past infection of the urinary tract and prostate, such as mumps in adolescence and STDs, may be affecting your fertility now even if they have long cleared up. If this had happened, get some advice from your doctor.
Get the timing right: Recognising the changes in your body when you are ovulating will help you pinpoint the best time to conceive. Avoid becoming too obsessive – keep the spontaneity and the excitement of lovemaking alive for the rest of the month.

You: As ovulation approaches, you will feel more lubricated and wet, anddischarge will be clear and starchy. Your basal body temperature will risebetween 0.5 and one degree Celsius.
Him: Sex every other day will help to keep her cycle regular and maximizes your sperm count.

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