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My dad shouts at me all the time

By Aunty Julie

Dear Aunty Julie,

I think I’m beginning to hate my father. He is too rude to me all time. He shouts at me and doesn’t seem to regard me at all. I can’t find happiness when he is around me . I have two brothers: one bigger and one smaller. Whenever my bigger or smaller brother does something, he always turns their fault on me. He doesn’t let me play games or watch TV. My brothers have mp3s, TV games but I have nothing . Are you sure I’m his child. I’m 19.Love-mr-and-mrs

Azeez, Ondo

Dear Azeez,

It appears you are going through a difficult time with your dad. This may be having an effect on your happiness and how you feel about yourself, especially if your dad is yelling at you, putting you down or calling you names.

At some point in their lives, most teenagers will say they hate their parents. We say this for different reasons, such as feeling like our parents are not being fair, are being too strict, or aren’t letting us do the things we want to do.

Unfortunately, it sounds like you have not been getting along well with your dad for a long time now. From what you have said, it’s difficult to say why your dad may be picking on you and favouring your other brothers over you.

Parents can be difficult to get along with at times, but remember they were young once as well. Your dad may have had similar issues with his dad and may not know how to act any differently.

If you haven’t already, try being kind to your brothers, and being polite to your dad even if he is rude to you. This can be really hard to do, but two wrongs don’t make a right. If you think you can, try being open and honest with your dad and finding a good time to talk with him about how his behaviour affects you. Try also talking to another adult you trust about how you feel and what’s happening to you.


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