By Aderonke Adeyeri
While the majority of domestic violence victims are women, male-oriented abuse occurs more often than many think. Naturally, men are stronger than women but that does not necessarily make it easier for them to have their way all the time.
According to a 2010 National Survey by the Centres for Disease Control and U.S Department of Justice, in the last 12 months, more men have been victims of intimate-partner physical violence than women.
The survey also indicates that men were also more often victims of psychological aggression. It is not also impossible that gender-biased individuals have overtime managed to sway society into believing that there are more female victims of domestic violence than men. Yet, men are being ignored and threatened by a double-edged sword; they are victimized by partners who also complain about being abused.
Also, an abused man faces a shortage of resources, skepticism from Police and other major legal obstacles, especially when it comes to gaining custody of his children from an abusive mother. Could it be natural or was it designed by men themselves?
Speaking with Saturday Vanguard, Israel Obi, who was a victim of hot vegetable oil bath by his wife, narrated his ordeal: “I got married to Victoria May 2005 and settled in Odorasanya in, Ijebu Igbo of Ogun State. It all started when my wife influenced me about our relocation to Lagos and I did not know it was the beginning of my trauma. Victoria, influenced by our new environment (hustle and bustle in Lagos), started coming late from her shop. And anytime I cautioned my wife, she turned the situation into an argument. She changed from my loving wife to the abusive spouse calling me different names.”
On that fateful night, Israel and his wife had an intense argument and around1.00am,Victoria went into her husband’s room and poured hot vegetable oil on him. Israel lamented, “It was our neighbours from the other flats that took me to a hospital and I was there for a whole month.”
After his discharge from the hospital, Victoria pleaded for forgiveness and they were together again. But barely two weeks after, Israel was receiving a phone call from a distant aunt and his wife thought it was a conversation with an unknown mistress. Victoria accused him of infidelity. “Before I knew what was happening, she smashed my phone to the ground and started destroying all the gadgets at home. When I tried to stop her, she became more aggressive and stabbed me with a knife,” he revealed.