With Florence Amagiya
‘As I speak, I feel like my whole world and life has crumbled before me! I know l must be in a nightmare and when l wake up, it will just be a dream. This cannot happen in real life to me. Why? Where did I go wrong? How did I fail as a mother and a wife? My husband in bed with my daughter.
My name is Lovett; everyone who knows me calls me mummy Joy. Joy is my biological child; I had her pregnancy when I was only 18 years old, then I just left secondary school and I thought the world was at my feet. Joy’s dad was everything a young girl of my age would want, so it was a crazy affair l had with him. Reason was thrown to the wind and we did everything we ought not to have done at that age. So, it was not a surprise to my family when l came home pregnant, my parents are from a strong Catholic bar ground, so abortion was out of it. I was made to face reality and I kept the pregnancy.
I had Joy nine months later, then l was already nineteen years old, but l still did not know a thing about nursing a baby. My mother took over Joy and I went back to school. I graduated when my mates did and got a job in a Bank, while working there I met Wale and before I knew what was happening we headed for the altar. It has being eight years since I got married to this wonderful man or so I thought and we have two beautiful children. Joy lives with us now because my mother is aged and she is writing Jamb. I travelled to England for a course in my office and I was called back by my Boss. I couldn’t get my husband on phone to tell him of my journey and I still couldn’t get him when l got to Nigeria. So l took a cab home.
I saw Wale’s car in the garage and wondered what he was doing home at the time of the day. I went in with my key unannounced. Joy’s room was ajar, so l knew she was around. I went upstairs to the room that I and Wale share and was greeted by the worse porn movie I have ever seen…
This is what our Stars have to say
Two options, forgive or…
Pat Akpabio, Artiste/Counselor
The woman in question should really feel bad because the husband has really betrayed the trust they share, it is okay for her to be sad and confuse. She should consider the options and weight of every decision she has to take, whether it is a regular hobby for the husband to sleep around or an accident of being carried away. Her husband was caught defiling her sixteen year old daughter, not her friend or neighbour. So, l can understand if she refuses to forgive him, I can also understand if she hates him and wished he was dead. But she can also forgive and decide never to have anything to do with him again or decide to forgive him if he has truly changed and they both can live their lives together amending the past by going for counseling. Above all, even if she decides to leave the man and marriage, she won’t find peace until she finally forgives and let go. So, the most important thing still boils down to forgiveness.
Get out of that life
Agatha Amata, TV personality
You cannot share your husband with your daughter, so naturally somebody has to be dropped in this situation. It cannot be your daughter because she is yours biologically and he is a ware of that fact before he did what he did. He has betrayed your trust and confidence and to me that’s the most important in any relationship. I don’t think l want to be moved by what my husband does outside because men will always be men, but he shouldn’t bring it to my home. He has not only betrayed my trust, he has given me an injury which will never heal by sleeping with my child. And for that reason I will walk away.
Matse Uwase, Radio Personality
The marriage ended the day you caught your husband in bed with your daughter. To be honest, he has not only defiled your bed, but he has proven that he is not a father figure to your children and that he cannot be trusted. I will advice that the lady in this story gathers all her children and start a new life without the man. If she doesn’t then she will have more issues in future that might destroy her. She should also do one thing to relieve her of the stress, she should forgive him, it is only in forgiveness that she will be healed.