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NOW THAT WE HAVE FOUND LOVE

Now that we’ve found love, what are we going to do with it? Most of us are always eager to find love, but the big thing about love is usually what we do with it after we’ve found it. I am sure for some of us, this is the best Valentine celebration we have ever had since we started celebrating the Val season.

There seem to be more awareness now, and there are people that went the extra mile to make sure that you had as much fun and romantic activities as possible this year. So that we don’t stay with the excuse of yesterday which is “there is hardly anywhere to go”.

Now we have more than enough, and for those of you that didn’t catch your fun this Valentine, it seems the fun continues, as there are shows taking place in and out of town, so you have no excuse. Just get out there and get all the loving you need, right? Yeah, right! Is it as easy as that? If it is that easy, how come so many people haven’t found their true love today? And how come those who claim to have found their true love lose it just before they settle down with it?

I mean you don’t have to go far anymore, you don’t have to point fingers and say those people over there just got a divorce. Some of us now can say that “my parents got a divorce” or my brother, sister, uncle, aunty, teacher, pastor, governor, etc just got a divorce.

We all seem to have someone in the family now that has a divorce certificate in their hands. Isn’t that amazing? When you see the way people go around looking for love, you probably think that they are also ready for it, but it’s obvious  that so many of us are either not ready for love or don’t know how to handle it with care when it finally comes our way.

As a Personal Counselor and Relationship Coach, I meet people everyday who has become casualties in the game of love, and I remember the song “why do fools fall in love, why do birds sing again and lovers wait for a break up day, why do they fall in love? Love is a foolish game; with love you can be ashamed. I know a fool you’ll be, because that fool’s been me.” I know the late Frank Nimmon made the song popular.

But thinking about it, Is it really fools who fall in love, or love itself is just a foolish game? I believe it’s both; only fools fall in love, and love itself can be a foolish game that is always ready to make people who engage in it very wise after sometime, but the problem most of us have about the game of love is that we are not sometimes patient enough to learn wisdom from it, or allow it to make us wise.

Let’s admit it, love makes us do foolish things and also makes us appear foolish to those who don’t really understand what we are going through, feeling or experiencing. How can someone die for a people that are saying “crucify him”

with the hope that through His death, they will have access to the throne of grace and receive mercy and grace at their time of need, and  that through His death, they can also receive salvation for their souls.. Yet this same people He was dying for were happy to see him die than live, just because at that time they didn’t understand His mission.

That seemed a foolish thing to do isn’t it? Did I hear you say yes, well that is what love makes us do; love makes us do foolish things. Tell me, isn’t it foolish to change your looks just because you just met someone new? Isn’t it foolish to start spending money flying to Abuja from Lagos every weekend on your own account just because you want to be with someone?

Isn’t it foolish to resign from your organization despite a promotion coming your way just because you can’t get married to someone who works in the same office as you do? Isn’t it foolish for a Modakeke man to get married to an Ile-Ife lady despite the differences that exist between them and have been shown in hostile ways in times past, or for an Ekiti man and Ijebu lady to fall in love despite sharp opinions that they have of each other?

Isn’t it foolish for a tall beautiful lady to fall in love with one “senior kukuru danger” (SKD) or a woman with a master’s degree to fall in love with a school dropout?

Yet we see all these things happen every day. But is that the reason why a lot of relationships are not working and why our marriages don’t last anymore than a minimum of four months now? I doubt it. I think we face this problem of break ups because when ever love gets into the hands of a dysfunctional person, that person is bound to abuse it.


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Comments expressed here do not reflect the opinions of vanguard newspapers or any employee thereof.