Ever imaginedÂ what the ground would look like should two Elephants fight as a saying goes? Not very pretty I think. Then, take this other scenario. Imagine what would happen when things fall apart between two very close women who once did almost everything together. Worse than the joint efforts of two elephants I can bet! How about when two men quarrel?
Is it a fact that the fall out or differences between men are never as deep and disastrous as those between women? Well, this is what we will be looking at in this issue, beginning from this edition.
The first piece you will be reading is a set of two stories as told by two erstwhileÂ friends. I met these two women at a cousinâ€™s place where they had been summoned to a peace meeting in an attempt to settle the differences between them.
I donâ€™t want to pass any comment before you read what they both had to say.
One of the two women, who claimed to be the aggrieved, had come separately before now to state her side of the matter to my cousin.
They were subsequently invited together which coincided with the day I was visiting. Though as an on-looker, I was invited intermittently to express my views, but at the end of the day, we could only advice that they both try to renew their friendship and forget all that had transpired, because my cousin and I were confused and short for words.
Please read, make up your mind and share your thoughts with us. Our address remains: The Human Angle, Vanguard, P.M.B.1007, Apapa, Lagos. And e-mail address: firstname.lastname@example.orgÂ Cheers!!
Bianca, (36), Business woman, refuted her friendâ€™s allegations and insists she is only protecting her home. She began her presentation last Thursday, stating herÂ side of the problem:
What more could I have done under the circumstance? If she had informed me earlier that she was planning to leave her matrimonial home, then I would have known what to do and even helped her to hasten things up.
And please, help me tell her, if that is her plans, I have no plans to leave my own family and so cannot do something as foolishly bold as bringing my lover to a party that I know many familiar faces will attend.
Even when my husband asked me if she was with the man beside her, I told him I didnâ€™t know the man, but only greeted him because I saw him at their table.
I believe I did all I did with sincerity, honesty and love for my friend and was trying to protect her. If we sat at the same table, there was no way my husband would not have discovered the identity of the man, and you can imagine the type of problem we will all be in right now.
Again, if he discovered that I knew the man, there was no way he would not conclude that I am engaged in a similar activity since we are supposed to be best of friends. I donâ€™t think I could have done any better than I did, given the circumstance.
But my actions annoyed her and this I believe is the cause of the whole problem. Since then, she has been behaving funny towards me.
The following evening, she came to my shop and accused me of putting her down in front of her our other friends. That they all complained that I neglected them and behaved like I was superior to them. She wanted to know why my husband had to accompany me to the party without her being aware of my plans. She accused me of trying to behave like a saint.
I must confess that I was very surprised because such a thing had never crossed my mind. I tried to explain what happened to her and I thought she understood. But I made a mistake.
From then on, she stopped coming to my shop to spend time with me like she used to whenever I am around. She just began displaying all sorts of characters I had never imagine her capable of.
Prior to this, she used to inform me about all her activities. In fact, sometimes when they bring things for sale in her office, she will buy for me and collect her money later because she always insists on our using the same or similar things for outings. At times when I have goods for sale, she takes them to her office for me too. But this changed after the incident.
I started seeing things on her that I had never seen before, nor had any idea that she had. When I ask, she wouldalways have an excuse or explanation for it. It was either sold to her at the office or a gift from one of her lovers or friend that I did not know, which is quite unusual.
I realised that she was actually trying to sideline me, so I took it in my stride too. This was when I started doing some things secretly. Ask her if it is a lie that I did not accuse her several times about these things. She wouldnâ€™t talk about that now, would she?
I really donâ€™t have much to say about all these. In fact, I feel ashamed coming here to discuss this sort of thing, especially in the presence of a stranger. But as she said, you are a woman and ought to understand some of these things.
I would never have raised this issue but for the fact she came to report me. I am not quarreling with her. And that is my own case. However, before I round up, I must touch on some of the issues she raised.
She claims that she has given me boyfriends and that it is not her fault that I donâ€™t have enough. Well, I know that I donâ€™t have many, but it is not because they donâ€™t approach me. It is because I donâ€™t want them and I have not complained about the few that I have.
I believe that one good man is better than several irresponsible men. I just canâ€™t start going out with any man unless I like him. For me, it is not just for the money, there should be some degree of likeness in it, otherwise, one will not be better than a prostitute soliciting customers in a hotel. Moreover, how many men will I go out with at the same time?
Ask her if I have not introduced some men to her in the past too. At least, I can mention names of some men she met through me. How many times do I go about telling people that I introduced someone to her? Of what benefit will that be to our friendship?
She is the one that is jealous of me. I have known this for years now, yet, I have accommodated all her excesses. Whenever I have a new friend, I mean female friends oh, who come to visit, she will always go cold. If she sees me going out with anyone besides her, then, I am in trouble. She would nag and find fault with them.